


Loves Me, Loves Me Not

by Genie_of_the_Fourth_Wall



Series: Growing Up [3]
Category: Kindergarten (Video Games 2017 2019)
Genre: Bugs & Insects, Bullying, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Character Study, Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Knife Mention, Post-Canon, Pre-Canon, We’re dealing with both, strap in kiddos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2020-10-26 17:00:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20745629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Genie_of_the_Fourth_Wall/pseuds/Genie_of_the_Fourth_Wall
Summary: Cindy liked to think of herself as a beautiful, blooming flower, but she still had a long way to grow.





	1. House

**Author's Note:**

> First multi-chapter story of this series, yeet! I love Cindy so much. So much so that I actually started an ask-blog for her when those really started to take off in the Kindergarten fandom. I fell out of pace with that really quickly (I’m just really bad at motivating myself to draw), but I always wanted to continue expressing my interpretation of Cindy’s character. And thus, this story was born! In a way, this really makes this the start of my series of Kindergarten stories. I hope you all enjoy! (In case you’re curious, the blog is ask-the-adorable-cindy on Tumblr. I really need to update it, I’m pretty sure I still have the ask box labeled as open lol).

_Squish, squish, squish._

Cindy crouched by the sidewalk, squishing ants underneath her thumb. The sun was starting to set, but the late-summer heat kept her pleasantly warm. It was quiet. Nobody knew she was out here, just the way she liked it. The moment Cindy had heard her mother screech “-you goddamn criminal!”, she slipped out of her room and through the back door. She hated listening to her parents argue. Her mom threw a fit over the tiniest things, and her dad didn’t do a thing to stop her. They just went in circles over and over again, and it was just so loud, loud, **loud**.

_Squish, squish, squish._

Her older sister, Helena, was probably holed up in her room, blasting music through her headphones to drown out the yelling. Cindy thought Helena was pretty cool. Beautiful, popular, cheerleader. She was just like something out of the high school dramas Cindy loved to watch. Cindy wanted to be just like that. Luckily, Helena’s room had a lot of neat teenager stuff for Cindy to study. Clothes and makeup and movies, all tools for her to learn how to be the girl she aspired to be. Helena could be a little weird sometimes, though. She acted a lot differently when Cindy was the only person around. She was a lot less sweet, and she said bad words a lot more often. And then there was the time that Cindy had tried listening to her sister’s music. She expected it to be pretty and cute like the rest of her sister’s stuff. Instead, she was met by a dark, harsh noise that sent shivers down her spine. She didn’t understand a lot of the words, but it just sounded so angry. She didn’t try poking through her sister’s music collection again.

_Squish, squish, squish._

Squishing ants was fun. The way their bodies cracked under the pressure of her fingers was quite satisfying to Cindy. It was amazing how fragile they were, compared to her. She heard on the TV that ants were super strong and could carry fifty times their body weight. Fifty was a pretty bug number, Cindy was fairly sure. But that didn’t seem to stop her from being able to crush them. She must be pretty strong, Cindy thought.

_Squish, squish, squish._

Squishing ants wasn’t the only thing Cindy liked to do outside, of course. She loved to pick flowers. Her mom had tried to keep a garden at one point, but she didn’t have much of a green thumb and gave up on maintaining it. Left to their own devices, the little pink flowers grew wildly, spreading all over the yard. She collected them in her room, her bag, her pockets, anywhere she could keep them. They usually wilted pretty fast, but she could always pick more. In general, the yard was a wealth of fun opportunities. Much more fun than the inside of the house with her family, anyway. Sometimes she would catch lizards and cut their tails off with a knife she took from the kitchen. It made her feel powerful. Knives were nice like that. Shiny and dangerous and _powerful_.

_Squish, squish, squish._

Maybe somebody would realize that she was gone and come looking for her soon. Maybe her mom or her sister or her dad would open the front door and call for her to come inside. But for right now, the only things in the world were Cindy, the flowers, and the ants. And that was the way she liked it.

_Squish, squish, squish._


	2. Arts and Crafts

It was Cindy’s first day of kindergarten. She was excited, of course. Going to school and meeting new people was the first step to becoming the popular girl. Besides, it had been a while since she had been around kids her age. Her mom used to set up playdates between Cindy and her coworkers’ daughters, but she only ever hung out with each of them a few times before they stopped coming around. She wasn’t exactly sure why. Maybe it was her mom’s fault? Yeah, that was probably it.

She wished she didn’t have to take the gross school bus. Popular girls usually took their own cars to school, from what Cindy had seen in movies and TV. But her parents had work and Helena had a couple of years before she could get her license, so the school bus it was. She placed her bag between her and the aisle so no weirdos would sit next to her. She watched out the window as they approached the school. The building looked pretty small and ill-maintained. Cindy sniffed. It definitely wasn’t making a good first impression. As she got off the bus, she noticed some kids her age were standing around the yard. She went over to join them.

“Hm... and that’s seven. That should be everybody. If not, oh well. I don’t feel like standing outside any longer. Okay children! Gather around!” A large woman, presumably the teacher, called out to the students in the yard.

“My name is Ms. Applegate. I will be your teacher this year. That’s all I’m legally required to say at the moment, so let’s go inside for morning time.”

The classroom wasn’t great, but at least had the pretty pink dollhouse going for it. Cindy was perfectly happy playing house all by herself, but she didn’t want to be “sad, pathetic, and alone” as Ms. Applegate put it, so she scanned the classroom for any potential playmates. There was only one other girl in the class, a mousey kid with raven black hair. She was sitting by herself at one of the tables, intently focusing on something. Cindy walked up behind her. The table was covered in tissue paper, pipe cleaners, and glue sticks.

“What are you doing?” Cindy asked.

The girl jumped slightly, startled by Cindy’s sudden appearance. She glanced up at Cindy, then back to the craft materials on the table.

“Making paper flowers,” the girl answered.

“I love flowers! Can I watch?”

“Sure.” The girl smiled shyly. “I’m Lily. What’s your name?”

“My name is Cindy!”

“It’s nice to meet you, Cindy.”

Cindy chattered on, trying to make conversation, but Lily didn’t respond. She seemed totally concentrated on the bright pink flower she was currently working on. Cindy pouted. She didn’t appreciate being ignored, but she had to admit that the flower was really pretty. After pasting the last petal in place, Lily held up the flower, examining her work with a smile. She held it up to Cindy.

“Here. You can have it,” she said.

“Thanks! Pink is my favorite color. You’re really good at this,” Cindy said. She noticed the flower hair clip that Lily was wearing. Cindy tucked the paper flower into her hair. “There, now we match!”

Lily giggled. “I’m glad you like it.”

“Hey, Lily!”

Cindy and Lily turned to see two boys approaching. The one that had called out to them had the same raven black hair that Lily did. The other one had light blonde hair and shifty eyes. He stared at Lily with an odd intensity.

“Hi, I’m Billy. Lily’s my sister,” the boy introduced himself to Cindy. Then, he turned to Lily. “See, I told you you would make friends! This is Nugget, by the way.”

“Nugget is happy to meet you, pretty Lily,” the blonde boy said.

“Hey, what about me?!” Cindy scoffed.

Nugget ignored her. Billy gave her a friendly smile.

“Don’t worry, you’re pretty too,” he said.

“Hehe, that’s more like it! Hey, you should be my boyfriend!” Cindy said, her eyes lighting up.

“Boyfriend?” Billy echoed, confused.

“Well, you’re cute and nice and Lily is like my bestie now, so it just makes sense for you to be my boyfriend!”

“I guess it does. Sure, then!” Billy agreed. He didn’t seem to fully understand, but that was fine. Cindy would be sure to teach him soon enough.

Their conversation was cut off by the sound of a bell.

“Okay kids, that’s the lunch bell! Time to go head down to the cafeteria!” Ms. Applegate called to the class.

The group of four made their way to the cafeteria with the rest of the class, claiming one of the tables for their own. Luckily, they all had pack lunches. Cindy wasn’t sure if she could even handle _watching_ somebody eat the disgusting slop the school was attempting to pass off as “food”. Cindy wrinkled her nose as she saw what was inside her lunchbox. Soggy ham and cheese wasn’t much better. She looked at Lily and Billy’s peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with envy.

“Billy, swap lunches with me,” she demanded.

“Why, what’s wrong with yours?”

“I’m... vegan! Yeah, I’m vegan. I can’t eat this. My stupid mom keeps forgetting that.”

Cindy didn’t know exactly what vegan meant, but she knew it involved not eat certain foods. A lot of the pretty girls on TV said they were vegan, so clearly she should be vegan too. If only her mom packed better lunches.

“I’m your girlfriend! You gotta give it to me,” Cindy pressed.

“Fine, okay. Here you go.” Billy reluctantly handed her hid sandwich.

Cindy smirked in victory. She had definitely made a good choice.

“You know, it’s my birthday this weekend! You two should totally come. It’ll be super fun!” Cindy said. She pulled out a couple of the pretty paper invitations her mother had printed out for her to hand out at school. The twins glanced at each other, taking the invitations hesitantly.

“Can Nugget come too?” Billy asked.

“Did I invite him?” Cindy narrowed her eyes at her boyfriend.

“It’s fine, friend Billy. Nugget does not want to go anyway,” Nugget said.

Cindy scoffed. What a rude kid. Still, this school had definitely turned out better than she expected. She had found a best friend and a boyfriend on day one! Cindy smiled as she ate her peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Yeah, things were shaping up to be pretty perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly I’m not super sure about the pacing of this chapter. The hardest part about writing Cindy is that she has no sense of self-awarness. She doesn’t think of herself as an awful person, so it’s hard for me to think of believably mean things for her to do. Thus, I decided to run with her lack of self-awareness and tried to inform her flaws through the way others react to her. This does try to capture her perspective after all, so I feel like she would either disregard or completely leave out any of her more questionable actions. I hope that all comes across okay! Next chapter will be up real soon, it’s basically finished.


	3. Biscuit

After waiting through what Cindy felt was the longest week of her life, her birthday finally came. At least she had the twins to keep her entertained throughout the week. Even if Lily just seemed to get more and more quiet over time, and Billy didn’t smile as much as he did when they first met. Cindy was sure they would still have a ton of fun at her party. Cindy was totally ready for it. She had on her prettiest pink dress for the occasion, and she had been practically glued to the living room window the moment she was finished getting ready for the day. It was the first time she had personally invited people over, and she was more excited than she would even admit.

“Hey, grandma sent you a present. Don’t you want to open it?”

Cindy was momentarily broken out of her intense focus by the sound of her sister’s voice behind her. She turned around, sitting on the couch she was perched on.

“I’m busy, can’t you see that? I’ll open grandma’s present later.”

“Uh, busy doing... what, exactly?”

“Waiting for my friends!”

“Have you not heard mom bitching for the past half hour? I don’t think anybody’s coming, Cindy.”

Cindy had been vaguely aware of the sound of her mom talking on the phone in the other room. It followed a pattern. She would start with a fake, overly-polite tone. Then she would gradually devolve into angry ranting. Hang up. Pause. Repeat. Cindy could catch snippets of what she was saying. Something about “cancelling last minute” and “ruining my little girl’s day”.

“Yeah, but she’s obviously talking to her work friends. These are the people _I _invited. I’m sure they’ll be here any second now!”

“...Okay, that’s great, but can you open the present? I don’t feel like having mom lecture at me today. Especially with how pissed she is right now.”

“I said, I’m busy!” Cindy huffed, turning back towards the window.

“Geez, fine. Happy freaking birthday,” Helena grumbled, “Fucking accident... making my life miserable...” She muttered the last part under her breath, but Cindy could still hear her. With that, her sister left the room.

Cindy stared out the window. So what if Billy and Lily hadn’t said anything when Cindy reminded them about the party? Surely they’d be here any moment. Surely.

* * *

Time passed. The sun set. Cindy refused to give up hope. At this point, it was more of a matter of pride than anything else. Suddenly, the front door opened. Cindy launched herself off the couch, excitement flooding through her. She paused as she saw who had come in. It was just her dad. She deflated slightly.

“Happy birthday, duckling! Were you waiting for me?” Cindy’s father gave her a warm smile, ruffling her hair.

“No,” Cindy said bluntly.

“O-oh... Okay. Well, how was y-“

“Where the hell have you been?!” Cindy’s mom stormed into the room, scowling at her husband. “You were supposed to be home two hours ago. You were out drinking, weren’t you?”

Her dad’s demeanor turned icy in an instant. “No, I wasn’t. Maybe it’s hard for you to believe, but I was getting my _daughter_ a present for her birthday.”

“Oh, so you just waited until the last minute to get her a gift? You’re so irresponsible.”

“Hey, I’ll have you know I’ve been planning this for a month-“

“Daddy, can I open your present? I wanna see what it is!” Cindy gave her parents the sweetest puppy-dog eyes she could muster. Anything to stop the arguing.

Her father’s expression softened. “Of course, sweetie. Here you go!”

Her dad handed her the box he had been hiding behind his back. It was cardboard, with a pretty pink bow tying the two handles together. Curiously, there were holes along the top of the box. Cindy tore off the ribbon, gasping in amazement at the adorable little dog sleeping inside. He blinked his eyes sleepily, having been awoken by the light and noise of the house. He jumped out of the box, cautiously sniffing Cindy. The dog gave her an experimental lick on the cheek. She giggled. Cindy’s mom had also let out a gasp, but her’s sounded more like a gasp of horror.

“Are you crazy?! I am not going to take care of some mutt that you bought without my permission. You-“

“Carol. Please. Can we not do this right now? I told you, I planned for this,” Cindy’s dad cut her off. He crouched down, smiling as Cindy wrapped her arms around her new friend. “Do you like him?”

“Like him? I love him! Thank you, daddy!” Cindy looked up at her mother with pleading eyes. “Please, mom. Please let me keep him.”

Her mom’s stern expression melted a little. She glanced at the dining room, seeing the untouched party decorations. She sighed. “Okay, you can keep him. But your father and I are going to have a long conversation about this later,” she said, shooting daggers at Cindy’s dad. For once, he didn’t seem to mind.

“I’m glad. I... I’m not around the house as much as I would like, and I don’t want my little duckling to get lonely. I love you, Cindy. I hope you know that,” he said.

“I love you too, daddy,” she said back. The words didn’t feel as hollow as they usually did.

Cindy returned her focus to her present, which had moved into her lap. “I’m going to name you Biscuit!” she declared.

“Okay, Cindy, time to go to bed,” her mom said, cutting off Cindy’s good mood.

“B-but... nobody showed up for ny party yet...”

“Cindy... it’s late. Nobody is going to come over now. You need to get ready for bed.”

“Just... just a little longer...”

Cindy hugged Biscuit close, trying to forget the feeling of disappointment and betrayal. One thought ran through her mind.

_How could they do this to me?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I had a lot of fun writing Cindy’s dysfunctional little family. This is the only time I plan to show her parents in-person during this fic, but I might write more about them later because I have a lot of headcanons about their family dynamics. Helena, on the other hand, *will* be showing up later, so I won’t say too much about her now. But she has a lot going on as well.


	4. Lost

School rolled around once again, and Cindy felt apprehensive. Sure, she wanted to give Lily and Billy a piece of her mind, but she also didn’t want to admit that her birthday had ended up so painfully lonely. Then, she had the perfect idea. She slipped out to the backyard, where Cindy’s parents had decided to keep Biscuit. There wasn’t anybody around to walk him during most of the day, so they decided it would be best for him to live outside. Cindy didn’t mind. It gave her a good excuse to escape the tension of the house. Biscuit was definitely the best gift she had ever received.

Yes, the best gift ever. That would show them. She didn’t _need_ them. Cindy slipped Biscuit into her backpack. It was a bit of a tight fit, but it worked. The class did show and tell in the afternoon. Cindy would show off Biscuit to the whole class. They would all see how great her birthday had been. Her daddy had gotten her a dog, after all. There’s no way she could be sad or lonely.

“Cindy! We got to go! Mom’ll kill you if you miss the bus!” Helena called from the back door.

Her sister walked her to and from the bus stop every day. Cindy didn’t really get why she bothered. It wasn’t that far, Cindy could get there perfectly fine on her own. Helena _did _try to avoid getting in trouble with their mom, but it’s not like she was around to know the details of Cindy’s commute. Unless Cindy told her, which she wouldn’t. She resented her mom almost as much as Helena did. Besides, she wouldn’t snitch on her big sister. Maybe Helena didn’t know that. Maybe Helena didn’t trust her enough to keep quiet, and that’s why she always walked with her. Considering how annoyed she always seemed with Cindy, that was the most likely reason. Yeah, that had to be it, Cindy thought.

Regardless, Cindy made her way to school like normal. In the yard, she saw the twins conversing with Nugget. She marched up to them, all of her fury bubbling to the surface.

“You! Where the fuck were you two on my birthday?!” Cindy screeched.

She certainly succeeded in intimidating at least one of the twins. Lily shrunk back, hiding behind her brother.

“Ah... we’re sorry... we, um... um...” Lily stammered. She looked to Billy for help.

A look of guilt flashed across Billy’s face for a moment, but his expression soon hardened.

“Lily, it’s okay. This ends _now_,” he murmured. He looked Cindy dead in the eyes. “We didn’t go to your party because you’re a mean, awful friend! All you do is boss us around. You force us to play whatever you want to play, give you whatever you want, and only hang out with _you_! We’re sick of it!”

Cindy gasped. “How dare you?! You’re my boyfriend, you can’t talk to me like this!”

“Well maybe I don’t want to be your stupid boyfriend!” Billy shot back.

“You’re breaking up with me?! You can’t do that, you-“

Cindy was cut off by her backpack wriggling off of her back. Luckily she wasn’t that tall, so it didn’t fall very far. She heard a muffled whine. She unzipped the bag to check on her pet.

“Shh, Biscuit! You’re supposed to be a surprise- hey!”

Biscuit jumped out of the bag, curiously sniffing around the yard. When Cindy tried to grab him, he bolted away.

“Children, what’s all the commotion over- is that a dog? Pets aren’t allowed on school grounds. You kids better get rid of it, or else the janitor is going to have to play exterminator. And none of us want to see that,” Ms. Applegate said.

“I got him!” Billy said, dashing after Biscuit. 

The dog ran away, startled by the quickly approaching stranger. After a bit of chase, Biscuit ran through the open school doors. Billy followed.

Neither of them came back.

* * *

Cindy did her best to hold back her tears on the bus ride home. The stupid principal had rushed everybody out of the building when class was over, rambling on about how the school had to be empty for cleaning or something. She hardly got a chance to try to find Biscuit. Her best friend was missing, and it was all because... because...

No, it couldn’t be her fault. She never, ever wanted to lose Biscuit. She wouldn’t have brought him to school if Lily and Billy hadn’t abandoned her. Yeah, it was their fault.

“_Their fault_,” Cindy whispered as tears stained the fabric of her backpack.

Helena slipped her cellphone into her purse with a sigh as Cindy hopped off the bus. She opened her mouth to say something, but then paused.

“Why are you crying? I haven’t even said anything yet,” Helena said.

“I-I’m not crying...” Cindy muttered.

“Look, I really don’t want to make you even more upset, but you have to know. Biscuit is missing, he got out of the yard somehow.”

“I know.”

Helena’s eyes narrowed. “If you had something to do with this, I would recommend keeping that fact away from mom.”

Cindy nodded solemnly. Helena’s expression softened.

“I know you absolutely loved that dog. I’m sure you didn’t mean for anything bad to happen. Just be more careful.”

With that, Helena pulled out her phone and tapped away as the pair walked home. Cindy’s face hardened into a look of determination. She would find Biscuit and get her revenge. She would make sure of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo, finally an update! I managed to get through my first semester of college, so now that I’m on break I should have more time to write! I’m excited to get back to work on this series, as well as fanfic in general. I’m hoping to finish this story relatively soon. This is about the halfway point, so hopefully all goes well!


	5. Monday

There was a new kid at school. He was pretty cute, and eager to please. Perfect boyfriend material, in Cindy’s eyes. Biscuit was still missing (as was Billy, but that wasn’t as important), so it would be nice to have a companion again. Besides, having an ally would make it easier to get her revenge on Lily. While the other girl was mostly focused on finding her brother, she still had the sense to avoid the Cindy and dodge her wrath. It was really infuriating. So, when the Kid made his way into the schoolyard, Cindy flashed him her sweetest smile and introduced herself.

“Hey there cutie. I’m Cindy. Wanna be my boyfriend?”

* * *

<strike>There was a terrible thud when Lily fell down the hole. Was she dead? She couldn’t be. Cuz if she was dead... well, if she was dead, it was her own fault, right? Stupid, clumsy Lily. It wasn’t Cindy’s fault. Certainly it wasn’t. Lily deserved it. Cindy had to remember that. Lily deserved everything she got. Her and her stupid brother were the ones who abandoned her. This is what she deserved.</strike>

<strike>Stupid Kid went out of his way to provoke her. Even worse, he was weirdly prepared to catch her in her lie. After he left, the principal decided that she should be expelled for causing so much trouble. He pulled out a gun. Cindy tried to run. She fell down with a shriek, searing pain coursing through her body. Tears ran down her face and she bit back a sob. “You know, I really don’t like to waste multiple bullets on one kid. You really are difficult, aren’t you?” That was the last thing Cindy heard before everything went dark.</strike>

<strike>Biscuit was dead. Biscuit was dead and that horrible janitor killed him. Killed him and cut him</strike> <strike> up into little bitty pieces and cooked him like in some twisted fairytale and _oh god Cindy had eaten him_. She wanted to throw up. She wanted to cry. But most importantly, she wanted to kill the janitor. She was going to kill him for what he did to Biscuit. Kill him, kill him, _kill him, KILL HIM_-</strike>

Billy was back. Apparently Kid had managed to find him trapped under the school or something. Cindy would never admit it, but she was glad he wasn’t dead. Just a little bit. He had been nice enough to try and catch Biscuit, after all. This did bring into question Kid’s usefulness as a boyfriend, though. If he was more interested in helping people like Lily and Billy, then maybe she should look elsewhere for a partner. Hey, maybe whatever new school they ended up in would have a good selection of cute boys. They were definitely going to have to transfer schools, after all. Considering the principal had apparently died. Cindy had always thought the guy was a creepy jerk, so she didn’t exactly care too much. Besides, it meant they got to go home early! Helena wouldn’t be by the bus stop to pick her up, but that was fine. Cindy knew the way home decently enough. She skipped along the sidewalk, humming to herself. Today had been pretty crazy, but tomorrow could only be better.

Probably.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chapter (which I’ve actually had written for a while), so I just decided to post this right after posting chapter 4. Just a quick overview of the first game’s events, from Cindy’s perspective. Also shows her introduction to Kid, which will be important. I’m definitely excited for the next chapter, so I should have that out soon!


	6. Tuesday

Cindy bounced on the trampoline, glad to be able to have some fun while the rest of the school went to hell. The teachers were dead, so it was a wonder nobody had sent everybody home early like yesterday. Maybe there just wasn’t anybody to send them home. Cindy didn’t dwell on what had happened in the bathroom. The loud thud outside the stall, Applegate’s blank stare as the life drained from her-

Suddenly, Cindy heard a rustling in the bushes. She turned to see a cat staring at her with big, blue eyes. Cindy gasped, hopping off the trampoline and crouching on the ground.

“Hi there! Aren’t you a cutie?” she cooed.

She held out her hand for the cat to sniff. It rubbed its head against her hand. Cindy giggled as she gave the kitty lots of pets. He purred happily. After a while, he trotted away. Curious, Cindy followed the cat to the back of the playground. He approached the dumpster, meowing and scratching on the side. Cindy could hear something that sounded suspiciously like a person cackling. Suddenly, the dumpster opened, and a raggedy old woman rose out from inside. The cat jumped up to greet her, balancing on the rim of the dumpster.

“Oooh, Gravy, I see you’ve come back home! Ah, who is this with you?” The woman asked, scratching the cat behind the ears.

“My name is Cindy. Why are you in the dumpster?”

“I live here! Probably won’t be able to stay for much longer, though. What a shame. Say, do you have any food on you? I’m awfully hungry!”

Cindy paused, unsure if she should be feeding random dumpster people. Then again, it wasn’t like she was going to eat her pack lunch anyway. 

“Here, you can have this. My stupid mom keeps forgetting I’m vegan.”

The woman snatched the bag out of her hands. She tore it open and took a big bite of the sandwich.

“Mmm, turkey! This is very nice, dear. As thanks, why don’t you take little Gravy with you? He seems to have taken a shine to you.”

Cindy’s eyes shone. “Sure! My dog Biscuit went missing, I’d love to have another pet!”

Agnes chuckled. “Great! Take good care of him, he’s a firecracker! But I think you two will get along just fine. Bye-bye now!”

With that, the dumpster hag descended back into her dumpster. Cindy heard the bell ring, signalling the end of school. She put her new pet in her bag and walked out of the entrance. She saw that the new janitor was holding a bloody axe for some reason, but that wasn’t her problem. The school bus took her to the usual stop, where her sister was waiting for her. Helena was staring intensely at her phone, tapping away. Cindy tugged at her sister’s skirt.

“Helena, time to go home!”

“Mmhm, yeah, I hear you. Seems like the new school was just as batshit crazy as the last one, huh?” Helena didn’t look up from her phone as the two walked.

“Yeah. Who’re you texting?”

“Travis. He’s giving me the details.”

Cindy frowned. “Who?”

“You know him. He works at your school. Hall monitor. He’s in my grade.”

“Oooh. I don’t think he’s ever told me his name,” Cindy said. “He’s a little grimy, but I guess he’s pretty nice. He gives me hall passes and stuff.”

Helena didn’t look up from her phone, but a small smile passed over her lips. “Yeah. He’s a good guy.”

Cindy took note of the shift in her sister’s expression. “Do you have a crush on him?”

“What? No,” Helena snorted, “Trust me, he definitely isn’t my type.”

Cindy knew better than to push that kind of subject. The pair lapsed into silence as they continued on their way home. Suddenly, Helena’s eyes widened. She fumbled with her phone, dropping it face-down on the concrete sidewalk. She cursed under her breath, gingerly picking it up. The screen was badly cracked, but that didn’t seem to bother her as much as Cindy thought it would. Her sister slowly turned towards Cindy. Helena looked at her little sister like she was seeing her for the first time.

“Cindy, I need to ask you something really, really important. I need you to tell me the truth, okay? I promise I won’t get you in trouble.” Helena stared Cindy dead in the eyes. The complete shift in the atmosphere caught the younger girl off-guard, and all she could do was nod.

“Cindy, did you help kill your teacher?”

Cindy blinked. She didn’t really expect that question. “Yeah, I did. She deserved it, though. She was a nasty cow.”

For a long time, Helena simply stared at Cindy. Her hands were shaking. Finally, she spoke again.

“That’s... that’s not okay, Cindy. I... _fuck_.”

“Helena...?” Cindy’s voice was small. She had seen her sister angry before, but this was different. She seemed... scared.

Helena took a shaky breath in, gathering herself.

“Cindy, I need you to listen to me. You can’t take death and murder so lightly. You’re so young, so I understand that you don’t get this kind of thing that well. You shouldn’t _have_ to learn about this kind of thing when you’re this young. But it isn’t okay. I know your school is dangerous, and I don’t want you to get hurt. So protect yourself if you need to, but please. Don’t go out of your way to hurt others, okay? Promise me.”

Cindy didn’t fully understand, but she could tell this was important to her sister. “Okay. I promise.”

“Thank you,” Helena said, giving her little sister a shaky smile. It felt like the most genuine smile Cindy had ever seen from her sister. “I’m sorry about all this. You... you’ve never had anybody to teach you this stuff, huh? I guess that’s sorta my fault. I’ve been a real shitty sister. I hope I can fix that.”

Helena slipped her cracked phone in her pocket and offered her hand to Cindy. Cindy grasped it, and the two continued walking. Then, Cindy’s bag started to rustle. Helena heard a muffled meow and raised her eyebrow.

“What do you have in there?”

“A kitty. His name is Gravy. A dumpster hag gave him to me.”

“I guess we’re going to the vet, then,” Helena sighed.

* * *

After a check-up at the vet, the two girls and their cat stopped by the supermarket for supplies. As they waited in line to pay, Helena tried her best to make conversation.

“So, Cindy. Do you have any friends at school?” Helena asked.

“Of course I do!” Cindy said confidently.

“Tell me about them.”

“Oh, um...” Cindy realized she couldn’t pinpoint a specific person to talk about.

Helena frowned. “You should get to know people better. It’s important to have friends. You can invite them over to hang out after school, if you want. I don’t mind watching you guys.”

“Okay! I definitely have friends, though. I’ll show you!”

“I look forward to it,” Helena smirked. She paused as they reached the front of the line. She handed the cashier a handful of cash and gathered the items in a bag. They made their way out of the store and towards the nearest bus stop.

“Hey, Helena. How do you make money? Do you have a job?” Cindy asked.

“Not... exactly,” Helena responded, looking away.

“Do you sell drugs?”

“What?! No!” Helena stared at her sister in shock. Though frankly it was less of a surprise after everything she had heard from Travis. Seriously, what kind of kindergarten was her sister going to?

“I do... favors. It varies, really. But you’d be surprised how much people are willing to pay to get stuff done.”

“Mm, I guess that makes sense,” Cindy said. A certain new kid came to her mind.

“Well, looks like the bus is here. Let’s finally get this cat home, okay?” Helena said.

From setting up the house for Gravy to Helena sweet-talking their parents into letting them keep the cat, Cindy wondered if this was what it was actually like to have a sister.

It was nice, she thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Agnes is super fun to write and if I can insert her naturally into my stories more often I definitely will.
> 
> On another note, Helena finally comes into her own as a supportive big sister! Before she just alternated between bitterness and pity, but now she’s determined to be somewhat of a good influence. I hope y’all don’t mind her, I know OCs can be kind of hit-or-miss. This chapter is definitely where she gets the most focus tho, so if she isn’t your cup of tea she’ll be more or less in the background for the rest of this fic. Though she may make cameo or two in the rest of the series.
> 
> Finally, this is my last fic update of 2019! Technically it’s already 2020 in parts of the world, but where I’m at we got an hour to go. Have a good New Year, y’all!


	7. Flowers

Cindy walked to her new school with a flare of determination in her eyes. She was going to show her sister that she had friends. She saw the Kid making his way towards the unfamiliar building.

“Hey, Kid!” she yelled. He stopped in his tracks. She sprinted to catch up, coming to a stop in front of him. She stood with her hands on her hips. “We’re friends, right?”

“Um... yeah? I guess,” Kid said with a shrug.

Cindy rolled her eyes. Geez, this guy was so wishy-washy.

“Okay. Come over to my house after school, then.”

“Why?” Kid blinked at her, confused.

“Because you’re my friend!” Cindy puffed out her cheeks.

Kid still didn’t seem to completely understand what was going on. “Is that all you need me to do? Nothing during the school day or anything?”

Cindy thought back to the conversation she had with her sister about favors.

“If you need something, I’m sure we can make some kind of deal. But this is different. I just want to play with you at my house. Cuz that’s what friends do!” she said.

“Friends, huh...?” Kid hesitated. “You aren’t going to take no for an answer, are you?”

“Nope!” Cindy said with a playful grin.

He sighed. “Okay, fine. I’ll meet you after school.”

“Yay!” She cheered.

* * *

Another day, another school that was decidedly kindergartener-unfriendly. Seriously, what was up with this district? Cindy lingered by the entrance, waiting for Kid to leave the school. Finally, he shuffled towards her.

“Over here!” Cindy called to him. Kid paused. “What are you doing? It’s rude to keep a lady waiting.”

“Oh. Right. I was going to your house. I forgot,” Kid muttered.

“You forgot?!” Cindy huffed.

Then, she started to take in Kid’s appearance. He looked... tired. He tried to keep his expression neutral, but his eyes were clearly glazed over with exhaustion. And maybe Cindy was imagining it, but it seemed like he somehow had more scars than he had the previous day. Cindy’s expression softened ever so slightly.

“I guess it’s whatever. C’mon, we don’t want the bus to leave without us.”

Cindy grabbed Kid’s hand and dragged him onto the bus. Helena was waiting for her at the bus stop as usual. She looked at the pair in surprise.

“Wow, I didn’t expect you to take me up on that offer so soon. Well, I’m happy for you, I guess.” Helena turned to Kid. “I’m Helena, Cindy’s older sister. What’s your name?”

Kid thought deeply about how to respond. Helena frowned. It wasn’t that complicated of a question, was it?

“I lost my name in the war,” he finally said. He spoke with so much seriousness that Helena didn’t know how to argue.

“We call him Kid,” Cindy interjected.

Helena sighed in exasperation. “Of course your friends are just as weird as you are, huh? Okay then, Kid. Your parents know you’re at a friend’s place, right?”

“Doesn’t matter. They’re never home anyway. I don’t remember the last time I saw them,” Kid explained bluntly.

Helena raised an eyebrow at Kid. “Do I need to call CPS?”

“It’s fine. They leave me food and notes. They’re just really busy with work, I guess.” Kid shrugged.

“If you say so...” Helena didn’t seem happy, but she didn’t push the matter further.

After the three reached the house, Helena looked the pair over. She seemed uncertain on what to do next.

“Okay, well... I’ve never taken care of kids like this, but I know you’re capable of entertaining yourselves. Just stay on the ground floor, I guess. Let me know if you need anything. I’ll be in the dining room doing my homework,” Helena said.

With that, she left the kids to their own devices. Cindy opened her mouth to propose a game, but Kid cut her off before she could say a word.

“I really don’t want to be your boyfriend again,” he said.

“Geez, that’s a little harsh. Besides, I’m not looking for that kind of thing. Can’t we just be friendly exes?” Cindy responded.

“I don’t get it. Why are you so set on being my friend? I haven’t given you that much reason to like me,” Kid pointed out.

Cindy tried to think of a retort, but he was kind of right. She had only known him for a few days, after all. Kid had mostly spent those days getting tangled up in the schools’ conspiracies. Yet for some reason, it felt like Cindy had known him for a lot longer than that. Like they had been through a lot more than the past couple days would suggest. Cindy’s thoughts were interrupted by Gravy rubbing himself against her legs. She reached down to scratch behind his ears.

“You have a cat?” Kid stared at Gravy intently. Something about his reaction was odd, but Cindy couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

“Yeah! His name is Gravy. I got him from this weird dumpster hag that lived behind our second school.”

“Huh.” Kid seemed surprised. He held out his hand for Gravy to sniff. The cat pressed his head into the boy’s hand. Kid smiled softly as he petted Gravy.

“Guess this is really where you belong, hm?”

As much as Cindy loved Gravy, she didn’t appreciate being ignored in her own home. She tried to steer the conversation back on track.

“You should feel lucky that I want to be your friend. I’m the prettiest, nicest girl ever,” Cindy said.

“You aren’t nice. At all,” Kid said bluntly. His tone wasn’t accusatory. He said it like it was a simple fact. Somehow, that was even more infuriating to Cindy.

“Excuse me?! I’m nice!” Cindy seethed.

“You get a kick out of torturing other girls. You expect your boyfriend to follow your every whim without question, and you hurt anybody who doesn’t do exactly what you want them to. So yeah, I’d say you’re a pretty bad person.”

Cindy shook with anger. “Well, if you think I’m so awful, then why did you agree to come over? Why didn’t you just say that we weren’t friends?”

“I do think of you as a friend. It doesn’t matter to me if you aren’t nice. Cuz I’m a bad person too,” Kid spoke softy.

“Because you killed Applegate?” Cindy asked.

“There’s a lot more to it than that.”

Cindy was taken aback by the shift in the mood. Kid didn’t usually show much emotion, but all of a sudden he seemed really sad. Cindy felt her anger fade.

“Helena found out that I helped with the plan to kill Applegate. She’s really worried about it. But I don’t get what the big deal is. Applegate was pretty terrible,” she said.

“I don’t like her at all, but people can change, given the chance. I hate her, but I still think it’s sad that she’ll never have that opportunity now. This is how things turned out, and nobody can take it back.”

Kid seemed even more depressed than he did before. Seeing him like this made Cindy’s stomach twist. She thought of some way to make things better.

“Hey, lemme show you something,” she said.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him to the back door.

“Helena, we’re going into the backyard!”

“Okay, just close the door behind you! Don’t let Gravy get out of the house!” Helena called back.

Still holding Kid’s hand, Cindy slipped out the door and into the yard. The garden was still as wildly overgrown as ever, and her favorite pink flowers were in bloom. She sat down next to a particularly nice patch and started to pluck some out of the ground. Kid sat next to her, staring at the flowers.

“This is one of my favorite places ever. It’s always nice and peaceful here,” Cindy said.

“Mmhm,” Kid hummed in agreement. He seemed much calmer now.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while. However, a question tugged at Cindy’s thoughts.

“You said that people can change. But can a bad person really become good?”

“I think they can, if they try.” Kid gave Cindy a pointed look.

She pouted. “Okay, I get it. What do you think I should do?”

“Stop going out of your way to hurt other people. Apologize for the bads things you’ve done.”

“If I do that... if I’m nice, will people want to be my friend?”

Kid gave a noncommittal shrug. “Doesn’t hurt to try.”

“But you’re my friend, no matter what, right?” Cindy asked. Her voice lacked it’s usual arrogance.   
Kid could tell she was asking the question in earnest.

He smiled. “Of course.”

Cindy beamed at him. “Here.”

She handed him the flowers that she had picked from the ground. They were bunched together in a rough bouquet.

“Thanks, Cindy.”

“Obviously. You’re my friend, after all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kid/Cindy friendship is my jam. They just have a really fun dynamic. Kid’s real existential for a five-year-old, but being stuck in a deadly time-loop will do that to you. In case you missed it, the “I lost my name in the war” thing is a reference to a line of dialogue from the (murderous) Janitor in the second game. Even though it’s just the old man’s crazy ramblings, I felt like Kid would relate to that line. Anyway, I only have one more chapter planned for this story, so it should be wrapping up really soon!


	8. Friendship Bracelet

_”Stop going out of your way to hurt other people. Apologize for the bads things you’ve done.”_

Kid’s words rang in Cindy’s ears as she paced around the playground. Deep down, she knew what he meant. The difficult part was admitting she had done something wrong. She had thought she was playing the part of the popular girl really well, yet she was the one with hardly any friends. It was the opposite of what she had seen in the movies and on TV. Cindy did want to have friends, though, so it seemed that she would have to take Kid’s advice. As much as she didn’t want to.

She saw Lily hanging out with her brother and Nugget, like always. Billy was scribbling away at a piece of paper, talking animatedly. Lily listened quietly, running her fingers through her hair. Nugget was digging in the dirt a short distance away, but he seemed to be listening as well. Cindy knew what she had to do. She took a deep breath. It was now or never.

“Hey! Lily!”

Lily flinched slightly as Cindy approached, inching closer to Billy for comfort. Nugget stood up, placing himself between the two girls.

“What does the nasty Cindy want with the pretty Lily?” he growled.

Cindy rolled her eyes. “Chill out, weirdo. I just want to talk.”

Nugget stayed put, but he didn’t say anything else. Cindy took that as her cue to continue.

“I... I’m sorry for being really mean to you. We should be friends again.” Cindy spoke quickly, fighting to get the words out. She stared at the ground, her face flushed.

“You... really mean that?” Lily asked.

“Really,” Cindy said.

“I... wow...” Lily stared at Cindy with wide eyes. “I appreciate the apology. It means a lot to me. But... I don’t think I’m ready to be friends with you again. I’m sorry.”

Cindy’s head snapped up. “Wait, what?! But I apologized! That means you gotta forgive me!”

“I just can’t! Not after everything you did to me. At least, for now...” Lily spoke firmly. There was a strength in her eyes that Cindy had never seen before.

“B-but... That’s not how this works! I apologized! Can’t you just forgive me?! C’mon, forgive me already!” Cindy’s voice caught in her throat. She was shaking. She couldn’t stop. The pitch of her words grew higher and higher, morphing into a shriek. 

“Forgive me, _forgive me, FORGIVE ME!_”

Cindy was just barely aware of the hand that slipped around her wrist, leading her to the back of the playground. She slumped onto to the ground. Hot tears ran down her cheeks as she bit back sobs. Kid sat next to her. He didn’t say anything, but that was enough. After a while, Cindy had cried herself dry. She tucked her legs against her chest, resting her head on her knees.

“U-um, Cindy?”

Cindy looked up. Penny was standing in front of her, looking slightly nervous. Cindy didn’t know Penny that well. Outside of a friendly greeting from the (former) principal’s daughter when they first met on Tuesday, the two hadn’t spoken to each other at all. Cindy was confused as to why the android was approaching her now.

“I just wanted to say, I thought it was really nice how you tried apologizing to Lily like that. I know... I know how hard it is to make up for the things you’ve done in the past. So... I think that was very brave of you,” Penny said softly.

“R-really?” Cindy sniffed.

“Yeah.” Penny nodded.

“Thanks. Penny, right? Um... I’m sorry about making Kid stick gum in your hair the other day,” Cindy said.

Penny paused. For a second, Cindy could’ve sworn she heard a whirring noise coming from the other girl. Then she perked up.

“Oh, that! I forgive you. Honestly, I had forgotten all about that. It definitely wasn’t the most traumatizing thing to happen to me that day.”

Cindy saw Kid cringe slightly out of the corner of her eye. Clearly, he knew more about that situation than she did. Not like that was surprising. He was always getting himself involved in the weirdest things. Cindy returned her attention to Penny, who had stuck out her hand. She was holding something pink and purple.

“This is for you. I was actually wondering if, maybe, you would... want to be friends?” she asked shyly.

Cindy took the something from Penny’s hands. It was a friendship bracelet, the same bright pink and purple as her favorite dress. She wordlessly ran her fingers over it. The thread was surprisingly soft, and the knots were perfectly aligned. Cindy could see the care that had gone into the craftsmanship. For a moment, she thought of the paper flower shoved under her bed, and felt a pang in her chest. Something warm and wet roll down her cheeks. Oh. She was crying again.

“I-I’m sorry! Do you not like it?” Penny asked, panicked.

Cindy shook her head, rubbing the tears off of her face. “No. I like it a lot. I would... I would really like to be friends with you.”

Penny beamed. “Oh, I’m so happy! You were right, Kid. This was a good idea!”

“Wait, what?” Cindy turned to Kid. A light blush dusted his cheeks.

“Well, you both needed friends, so...” Kid scratched the back of his head.

Cindy rolled her eyes. “You didn’t have to do that, you dork. You’re my friend too, remember?”

“Yeah! I even made you your own bracelet!” Penny added.

She promptly slipped it onto his wrist. Kid’s bracelet was bright blue, gold, and white. It kinda reminded Cindy of the backs of Monstermon cards. Kid seemed stunned for a moment. Cindy jumped up.

“C’mon. Enough of this sappy stuff. Let’s go play!”

Cindy grabbed her two friends by the hand and pulled them toward the pile of playground toys provided by the school. She was fairly sure she had seen a jumprope in there. As he stumbled to keep up, Kid watched Cindy’s face. Her eyes were still bloodshot and puffy, but her usual stubborn determination had returned. It was nice, he thought, now that it lacked the air of malice he had gotten to know so well. Kid found himself smiling at the change.

_Yeah, maybe this will work out._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that’s the end... of this story! The Growing Up series is far from done, however. I have plans for stories that gives all of the kiddos at least some spotlight. It won’t always be one per story, tho. For example, the next one will tackle Lily, Billy, and Nugget together. It’ll also be on the shorter side. I hope you enjoyed Cindy’s arc, and look forward to more of this series!


End file.
